Body Thoughts

Hey There! Happy almost Friday!!

 I hope you are doing well and that this week has treated you decent.  The days just seem longer to me this week.  I've been thinking about my body a lot this week and also about when the hell am I going to start kicking more butt again and workout more consistently?!  I mean, yeah.  I'd say we are pretty busy and have some stuff going on.  But who doesn't?  I'm in two weddings this year, so the deets are in the back of my head for certain stuff with that and slowly creeping up on me. A couple personal things are on the mind too, but it's nothing critically dire.  I still just get up, go to work, come home and either cook something yummy, jot down blog post ideas, although that's pretty much every day.  Or we watch movies, or I  workout.  But I only worked out once this week. Meh.

I ran 2 miles last night.  Don't even ask me how.  But I worked til 7pm last night {making up a few hours this week to have next Friday off}!  Can you say, FOUR DAY WEEKEND?!  And so it was about 8:15 when I finally got home. I walked Sam and then decided to just get out and run!  It was a warm yet muggy evening and I did not want another day of being basically sedentary.  It felt good and I was pretty sweaty. Being sweaty also forced me to wash my hair. But that's neither here nor there. :)  I just want to have that exact MoJo every.single.day. 



source

I also cleaned up the front yard plants afterward by weeding, trimming, sweeping, and watering. I need that energy every day!  All in all, Wednesday was a grand day!



Oh  and yeah. The food below was dinner last night.  Delicious!  That's the only better thing that I've been better at this week.  I ate pretty well/hardly anything with sustenance.  But I was fine and only really ate when I reallllly felt hungry.  This week included a lot more coffee. It was just that necessary. 

Broiled tomato and green pepper with black bean dip, cheddar cheese, sriracha, salt, pepper, and plain Greek yogurt topped with a sprinkle of cayenne pepper.  My belly was thrilled.

When I say that I was 'thinking about my body', I don't mean for it to come across in a negative way.  And I really don't kick myself in the butt for not working out as much as I used to, but yes, I'll be honest with you.  It totally bothers me.  I know, I know.  So do something about it. I am right there with ya!  I hear you!  And I will. Every week is different. Every day is different.  Right? So maybe next week will be my week to start kicking butt again!  I plan on it!  But back to the body thing.  I felt like discussing my body with you. How over the years I went through many different changes and thoughts about my own body image and how far I've come today.

 

No. I never had an eating disorder; although, when I was much younger and before puberty of course, I ate like a bird!  Sorry mom!  I was a size 0 and a very picky eater until 9th grade I'd say.  Crazy, yes!  I then suddenly became a human garbage disposal and had a healthy and wonderful appetite.  I'd say it wasn't until 2001-2002 that I wasn't gaining crazy poundage, but I despised exercise and dismissed the thought of joining a gym very quickly.  I gained some weight but nothing on my body was toned; like, at all.  I was so untoned because of the lack of exercise.  I ate fattening and rich foods and just way-out-of-control portions for lunch and dinner most days. Never mind the extra calories late at night such as chips and salsa or cookies. Oh, and add my favorite soda obsession which was Root Beer.  It  didn't matter to me what I ate.  I enjoyed every moment of it and never worked out.

If I had known that Santa was well, ya know, non-existent, I would have probably eaten all of that.  And taken the money.

Don't get me wrong, I was an active child. I took dance lessons from age 4 until 17 and played basketball with friends here and there and also joined the high school color guard team.  I wasn't that lazy.  But that was it. And I ate. I ate too much; with not a care in the world about my health or body image. 

I even went through a period in my life, at age 16,when I was still pretty thin, that I did not want to be thin. So I ate even more. I had this weird thought that seeing someones collar bone  or spine was gross and I never wanted to look like that.  Healthy way of thinking right?  I mean I guess so. But I remember at that time telling people/family about that and they would keep reiterating to me that I look fine and not to worry about that because I won't let myself get like that.  It was still a strange thought process and weird obsession for me even though it was totally good that I was not starving myself.  It's hard to explain, but that's how I felt back then.

Mom and me. 11th grade/1999. {totally not in shape, but healthy}.

My weight/body image for me, always, has just been about being comfortable.  Until the end of 2011, when hubby and I finally decided that joining a gym was absolutely necessary, I never felt  100% comfortable in my own skin.  It may sound silly, but I didn't.  My stomach was the worst part. It's still the same, of course, that feeling of giving birth to an alien when all ya did was have an apple or a few crackers or even one dark chocolate, and the stomach becomes huge!  What's up with that?!  It could be a hereditary/IBS thing maybe?  I mean, nothing hurts there.  Maybe one day I will get that checked out.

I can't be the only woman who has experienced Food Baby Syndrome, can I?

But all of that aside, once I started working out consistently and really paying attention to what I ate and the portion sizes, I totally saw a difference.  Inches were lost!!  Inches galore!  and after a good 6 months, I had dropped 13 pounds and was much more toned , mostly from cardio and also incorporating squats and free weights.  My goal was to get in better shape and lose some weight before I was 30. I did it! And that was the main thought that kept me going. And also having hubby join the gym, too.  Him going to the gym/us going together here and there was motivation for me as well.  And I hate to say this, because I'm certainly no expert, but in the beginning of wanting to shed some pounds, you really  have to restrict eating bad foods/your calorie intake. It's about what you put in your mouth too. Exercise totally can help, but you can't expect to keep at your bad diet and lose weight. I'd say definitely count calories in the very beginning.  That totally helped me lose some pounds.  You should be burning more calories than you consume. :)

Today, I'm still maintaining that weight loss almost exactly and feel pretty comfortable with myself.  I'm currently stuffed from tonight's dinner and will not be eating anything else the rest of the night.

Grilled chicken taco salad from Qdoba!  Amaze-balls!

I will now end this crazy long post that I'm sure both you and I did not think would be this lengthy, with past photos of me and my hubby and a few more recent ones.  Side note:  the hubby lost a good 30 pounds and has still been pretty good at maintaining that loss.  However, we both have been on the procrastination train with exercise.  Hopefully we'll snap back into the scene soon.

Thanks for reading and listening. I heart you.  And hey, it's almost Friday!!

Back in the day:

My face just decided to blow up...

My worst; totally out of shape. { I personally felt}  August 2011.

Today:

Here's to more gym time!!  G'nite. :)